( 2 reviews )
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Posted: Aug 19 2007
Violet Keppel Trefusis and Vita Sackville-West had a passionate and tumultuous love affair between 1918 and 1920; they had been childhood friends. The affair ended in 1921. Vita was happily married to Harold Nicolson, although the marriage was troubled at the beginning of the affair, and Violet was unwillingly married to Denys Trefusis in 1919 when she was deeply in love with Vita. The love affair caused a scandal in British high society but was forgotten by 1973 when Nigel Nicolson's `Portrait of a Marriage' brought the details boldly into the public domain. Violet does not appear to have left any intimate papers of her own. In her selective, discreet, memoire `Don't Look Around' (1952) she refers to a diary written in the early 1920's which she still had when she wrote her book. The diary does not appear to have survived and I assume she destroyed this and any other revelatory papers. Vita's letters to Violet were destroyed by Denys in July 1919. Others followed but do not survive but there are existing letters that date from the 1940's and 1950's (excerpts are included in this book). Vita Sackville-West kept all of Violet's letters, notes and telegrams (I wonder if Violet knew) including those Violet had asked her to destroy. `Violet to Vita' includes virtually all of them. The book is meant to give Violet's point of view to be read alongside Vita's secret memoire as published in `Portrait of a Marriage'. The book has a long, useful introduction in which Mitchell Leaska summarises the love story and offers some analysis. This is a valuable book for those still interested in Violet and Vita (this interest was at its height around 1990 when `Portrait of a Marriage' was shown dramatised by the BBC ). `Violet to Vita' inspired Diana Souhami's `Mrs Keppel and Her Daughter'. The letters show that Violet was an eloquent, elegant writer (even when dashing off desperate notes). This is her true voice and on many occasions it is irresistible. She had a powerful personality. The letters also show that she was exuberant, idealistic, very emotional, very romantic, ungrounded, clever, intelligent, histrionic, mercurial. She wanted 'freedom' yet was hopelessly dependent on Vita or more particularly Vita's alter-ego, Julian. She was either blind to the risks she was taking or foolishly brave. Violet's uncontrollable passion for Vita/Julian led to consequences that overwhelmed her as the letters show. They also show that Violet and Vita had a real and profound bond between them (scorned as delusional by interested onlookers) that could not be repeated with anyone else - but it was too outré, badly timed, undermined and costly to be permanent. Vita would not break through conventions, hurt her family and fling away her reputation as Violet demanded (and Vita had promised). In this she had the great support of her husband. Violet's fatal flaw (I think the letters show this) may have been her primary focus on and belief in Julian rather than Vita. Violet had invested too much in Julian. She wrote that she was bonded to Julian body and soul but the letters show that Vita became more distant; there was a dislocation. After Violet's forced marriage to Denys, she would stay true to Julian not realising that Julian had been beaten down in the tumult or that Vita was writing her memoire from July 1920 distancing herself further. By the end of the book we witness the affair and an isolated Violet being 'crushed down', most skillfully by her mother (later, perhaps acknowledging the damage, she would reclaim Violet as her beloved and favourite daughter). It is like watching a vibrant, incandescent flame, Violet, being suffocated. I found the letters hard to read in one go and I have read them in sessions. Sometimes the letters feel like a bombardment; sometimes they are almost too poignant and private to read. One has to take a break. The absence of Vita's letters is a loss. Ultimately, Vita's memoire and these letters are a miracle because they have survived and been published. This is all down to Vita for keeping them safe and to Nigel for making them available. They do not perfectly complement each other but, together, they are an eloquent posthumous testament to these two extraordinary women. The following excerpt is not from one of Violet's most elegant letters but it gives a sense of Violet's increasingly powerless and isolated position in November 1920 (Vita was distant; Vita's mother spread scandal and denounced the affair; the death-blow would come later from Violet's own mother). She wrote: "O my darling, I awoke trembling from a dreadful dream of you and your mother. I think you both laughed and mocked me, and since you had no further need for me - O God, it's too awful.... How I wish I was Harold Nicolson! He can be with you as much as he pleases. His words come back to me: 'I have always had everything I wanted' - and I am the begger at your gate..."
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( 2 of 2 found this review helpful ) Posted: Aug 18 2007
Violet Keppel Trefusis and Vita Sackville-West had a passionate and tumultuous love affair between 1918 and 1920; they had been childhood friends. The affair ended in 1921. Vita was happily married to Harold Nicolson, although the marriage was troubled at the beginning of the affair, and Violet was unwillingly married to Denys Trefusis in 1919 when she was deeply in love with Vita. The love affair caused a scandal in British high society but was forgotten by 1973 when Nigel Nicolson's `Portrait of a Marriage' brought the details boldly into the public domain. Violet does not appear to have left any intimate papers of her own. In her selective, discreet, memoire `Don't Look Around' (1952) she refers to a diary written in the early 1920's which she still had when she wrote her book. The diary does not appear to have survived and I assume she destroyed this and any other revelatory papers. Vita's letters to Violet were destroyed by Denys in July 1919. Others followed but do not survive but there are existing letters that date from the 1940's and 1950's (excerpts are included in this book). Vita Sackville-West kept all of Violet's letters, notes and telegrams (I wonder if Violet knew) including those Violet had asked her to destroy. `Violet to Vita' includes virtually all of them. The book is meant to give Violet's point of view to be read alongside Vita's secret memoire as published in `Portrait of a Marriage'. The book has a long, useful introduction in which Mitchell Leaska summarises the love story and offers some analysis. This is a valuable book for those still interested in Violet and Vita (this interest was at its height around 1990 when `Portrait of a Marriage' was shown dramatised by the BBC ). `Violet to Vita' inspired Diana Souhami's `Mrs Keppel and Her Daughter'. The letters show that Violet was an eloquent, elegant writer (even when dashing off desperate notes). This is her true voice and on many occasions it is irresistible. She had a powerful personality. The letters also show that she was exuberant, idealistic, very emotional, very romantic, ungrounded, clever, intelligent, histrionic, mercurial. She wanted 'freedom' yet was hopelessly dependent on Vita or more particularly Vita's alter-ego, Julian. She was either blind to the risks she was taking or foolishly brave. Violet's uncontrollable passion for Vita/Julian led to consequences that overwhelmed her as the letters show. They also show that Violet and Vita had a real and profound bond between them (scorned as delusional by interested onlookers) that could not be repeated with anyone else - but it was too outr??, badly timed, undermined and costly to be permanent. Vita would not break through conventions, hurt her family and fling away her reputation as Violet demanded (and Vita had promised). In this she had the great support of her husband. Violet's fatal flaw (I think the letters show this) may have been her primary focus on and belief in Julian rather than Vita. Violet had invested too much in Julian. She wrote that she was bonded to Julian body and soul but the letters show that Vita became more distant; there was a dislocation. After Violet's forced marriage to Denys, she would stay true to Julian not realising that Julian had been beaten down in the tumult or that Vita was writing her memoire from July 1920 distancing herself further. By the end of the book we witness the affair and an isolated Violet being 'crushed down', most skillfully by her mother (later, perhaps acknowledging the damage, she would reclaim Violet as her beloved and favourite daughter). It is like watching a vibrant, incandescent flame, Violet, being suffocated. I found the letters hard to read in one go and I have read them in sessions. Sometimes the letters feel like a bombardment; sometimes they are almost too poignant and private to read. One has to take a break. The absence of Vita's letters is a loss. Ultimately, Vita's memoire and these letters are a miracle because they have survived and been published. This is all down to Vita for keeping them safe and to Nigel for making them available. They do not perfectly complement each other but, together, they are an eloquent posthumous testament to these two extraordinary women. The following excerpt is not from one of Violet's most elegant letters but it gives a sense of Violet's increasingly powerless and isolated position in November 1920 (Vita was distant; Vita's mother spread scandal and denounced the affair; the death-blow would come later from Violet's own mother). She wrote: "O my darling, I awoke trembling from a dreadful dream of you and your mother. I think you both laughed and mocked me, and since you had no further need for me - O God, it's too awful.... How I wish I was Harold Nicolson! He can be with you as much as he pleases. His words come back to me: 'I have always had everything I wanted' - and I am the begger at your gate..."
